The prettiest things in my greenhouse right now are these coleus that were a gift from Mrs. Bread. One or both of them are grandchildren of plants I used to have by my front walk.
(If the last several posts seem random and boldfaced in strange ways, it’s because I’m still working through my Springtime Scheme for alphabetical blog posts.)
In my reading through the Gospel of Mark I came yesterday to the account of the crucifixion of our Lord. I wasn’t thinking at the time of how it was the eve of the Sunday of the Veneration of the Cross, because I was soon on my way to yet another birthday party, this time to celebrate Laddie’s turning two.
Later, I thought about how appropriate it was that I contemplate Christ’s being forsaken by his Father, taking that cup of death and thereby conquering and destroying death, so that we can drink from the cup of joy, and have a feast. This is truly a spiritual feast, and not the kind where we delight in earthly food. And for that reason it’s set right here in the middle of the Lenten fast. The following is from our church bulletin.
ON THE CROSS:
As they who walk on a long and hard way and are bowed down by fatigue find great relief and strengthening under the cool shade of a leafy tree, so do we find comfort, refreshment, and rejuvenation under the Life-giving Cross, which our Fathers “planted” on this Sunday.
Thus, we are fortified and enabled to continue our Lenten journey with a light step, rested and encouraged. Or, as before the arrival of the king, his royal standards, trophies, and emblems of victory come in procession and then the king himself appears in a triumphant parade, jubilant and rejoicing in his victory and filling those under him with joy, so does the Feast of the Cross precede the coming of our King, Jesus Christ. It warns us that He is about to proclaim His victory over death and appear to us in the glory of the Resurrection….
The present feast has been placed in the middle of 
Great Lent for another reason. The Fast can be likened to the spring of Marah whose waters the children of Israel encountered in the wilderness. This water was undrinkable due to its bitterness but became sweet when the Holy Prophet Moses dipped the wood into its depth. Likewise, the wood of the Cross sweetens the days of the Fast, which are bitter and often grievous because of our tears. Yet Christ comforts us…
Moreover, as the Holy Cross is called the Tree of Life, it is placed in the middle of the Fast, as the ancient tree of life was placed in the middle of the garden of Eden. By this, our Holy Fathers wished to remind us of Adam’s gluttony as well as the fact that through this Tree has condemnation been abolished. Therefore, if we bind ourselves to the Holy Cross, we shall never encounter death but shall inherit life eternal.
With my family and friends I have memorialized my husband in many ways in the last couple of weeks. The evening of the day that we decorated the grave, we had a short memorial service for him at my church. Ivy stood right by me holding her candle straight and steady for the whole fifteen minutes. After we sang and prayed together, we ate koliva together in his honor. “Eternal Memory!”
I’m not going to post a picture here every time I make one of these bowls of ceremonial boiled wheat, but this first anniversary was the Big One for me, so it bears telling about. I wanted to use blue Jordan almonds to decorate, but they were not to be found in the usual candy stores, so I put M&M’s instead, along with white almonds. Maggie helped me with the tricky job of placing candies on a bed of powdered sugar.
On the following weekend the agape meal I had committed to was accomplished. When I mentioned it two weeks ago, in the same post I put a photo of a big pot of soup I’d made, which I think was confusing; that soup had nothing to do with the agape meal that was to come. My menu for the meal that needed to feed about 100 people was: (What I call) Greek Beans, Cottage Fried Potatoes, Cabbage Salad with Tarragon and Toasted Almonds, and vegan Chocolate Carrot Cake.
I used about 15# of cabbage and 50# of potatoes, 20# of Great Northern beans, and about 10# of carrots for the cake. Six dedicated and necessary friends from church helped me both Saturday and Sunday, out of love for me and for my late husband. It was the first time I’d ever organized something like this, and the project filled my mind for many hours over the preceding weeks, as I scribbled my recipes and math problems and 
shopping lists on a sheaf of papers I tried to keep all together.
Several things didn’t work exactly as planned – when dealing with large quantities not only the quantities have to be adjusted, but cooking times and methods. Now I know!
Too many finely grated carrots were accidentally put into the cake batter, we couldn’t tell exactly to what degree, so I just gave the four sheet pans longer baking time and we had delectable brownies instead of cake.
In the morning before we started cooking I was jittery, and glad the day was finally here when I could start this last big effort. As I expected, once I got to the church kitchen and my crew began to execute my plans, the whole event was a lot of fun. The food got rave reviews, too!
And now the big One Year milestone has passed. These various commemorative events and tasks have helped me so much to focus my grief and prayers in a community-oriented and practical way. Can you believe that I had joy as well as grief? I didn’t have a minute to spare for brooding, but at the same time I was not distracted from the anniversary, but rather able to keep it in the most satisfying way — I’m very thankful.
It has always been in my plan that on the other side of the fountain from the back door would be a table and chairs, a place to sit and catch the first rays of sun in the morning, or any time that the house is cold and the great outdoors is warmer. That happens frequently around here. When the pool was there, the northwest corner of the yard, where in this shot you can see a Cécile Brünner rose bloooming, provided a square yard of pool decking where one might place a chair, and I did it many times.
As the months flew by, I started to wonder how I would ever force myself to trudge around stores to find the table and chairs I had envisioned. If a thing can’t be easily ordered online, I am the worst shopper.
Why would I want to spend hours in stores comparison shopping, being the Consumer of our consumer culture, when I could be the Contemplative sitting in the garden and reading, or the Creator potting up a succulent in the greenhouse, or the Friend writing a letter, etc. etc. ad infinitum.
But my Daugh
ters came to the rescue! When two of them were here last week and we found ourselves without the men for a few hours, we first thought of being Outdoorswomen and going on a walk or hike with the children. But they could see I needed some help of the sort that women often give each other, so we became Shoppers together for the morning, and they made the whole process seem easy. When we got home they immediately started putting my table together for me.
The next day we had begun sitting in this corner spot with its view of the whole backyard garden, doing our more pleasurable kinds of work and play. And yesterday I shopped all by myself and bought some pretty acrylic tumblers and pitcher, so when you come by for a visit we’ll drink lemonade together.
Happy April!
Gladsome Lights 